TAKING CONTROL OF YOUR OWN DESTINY.

I have always been the type of person who liked to have control over both my own life and the lives of those who came into mine at any stage. Control seems to have been a word I was born with on my lips if you speak to my mother, brothers, husband and children! I don’t know if this came from my Capricorn birth sign, those dreaded inherited genes or influences from past life lessons. Suffice to say that I guess you could say that I liked to have some say in what was happening around me, to me and from within me. Through all my questionings and turnings this I guess was one element which remained consistent so I guess it was trying to tell me that at least something was ‘right’ for me.

This could well explain the many battles I had during my earlier years with imposed conditions and thoughts being thrust at me. It is no wonder that I spent most of my time questioning and rebelling when others seemed to want to control so many of my thoughts and actions. When I look back to even the troubled times in my life I can see that I still had an element of control within me.

But in hindsight it know becomes quite clear that sometimes the determination to retain control almost sent me over the brink. I guess this also is a big reason why I have found studying as an adult much harder than as a child. The lessons as an adult are somewhat different but for some reason many of my teachers have stuck to the principle that they are the ones with all the knowledge and the students, no matter what their age or experience, are in need of instruction and lecturing.

I’ve had so many conflicts with teachers who ‘teach’ one particular thing in one particular way and to vary or modify the subject in question to suit individual needs is just not on the cards. For instance one of my lessons was a meditation sequence when I was first being instructed into the arts and benefits of meditation. My teacher structured the session in a particular way but for some reason it just did not gel with me. Whilst I understood the concept and the end result was not in question the method used to get from the beginning to the end just didn’t sit well with me and didn’t feel comfortable. When I went home I sat down and tried the meditation the way the teacher had told us to do it but nothing worked. Then I adapted some of the instructions, did it in a slightly different format but the end result was the same! So, I was happy to have reached the end result even though it was an adaptation of the original teaching. Rather than being supportive of my efforts to modify the meditation to best suit my needs the teacher was quite annoyed that I had tampered with her tried and true recipe!

Taking ownership of something and controlling the way it is used in your life can help to tailor teachings and concepts to your own individual needs. It is up to us to determine what we both want and need to learn and in what way these lessons will take place.

Taking control of my destiny meant that I allowed opportunities to present themselves at the right time and the right place. It also meant that I would spend many hours weighing up the pros and cons of various options presented to me. I no longer blindly followed the crowd. I found myself beginning to really think about where I wanted to be headed and what I wanted to be doing for the rest of my life. On of the most revealing things to happen lately was amazing for me and I felt like I’d had the ropes that bound me freed and the release from the restrictions was wonderful.

Now I have accepted my spirituality (warts 'n all) it has taken the blinkers off and showed me the spontaneity and creativity that had remained hidden for most of my life! I now cherish the fact that I come to things from a different direction and that it is not therefore wrong just because it is different. I can love and accept my individuality and the fact that I am unique and one of a kind. We need more of us to make this earth a more vibrant and interactive place to be. I was told quite clearly on more than one occasion during that weekend that ritual was not for ME! For others - maybe they need the structure and discipline of it - but I DON'T! Having control over your destiny is a good thing. You choose where you want to go, how long it will take you and what you want to be waiting for you at the end of the journey. So, take the reins and move at your own pace. Dance to your own music. Make your spiritual journey the trip of a lifetime.